Tuesday, March 4, 2014

My Thoughts on the Blog "You Might Be An...."

(Please note there is strong language used as quotes from another blog included in this blog entry.)

I love when I read a blog that reads like something I might have written. I do my best not to use "language," but I'm glad this blogger did (so I didn't have to). This particular piece is something I've been mulling over ever since someone I know was flipping out on Facebook because she wasn't allowed to do the Pinterest project she wanted to do for her daughters classroom for Valentine's Day because there is a strict "no food" policy. She acted as if it were the end of the world that they couldn't celebrate like she used to celebrate when she was in school (because we all know Pinterest was all the rage 25 years ago).

If you want to read "You Might Be an Asshat if you Think People with Food Allergies Are Ruining Your Life" in full, you can do so here (please be warned there is strong language used, so be careful who you share it with and where you read it).

If you'd prefer to read my favorite excerpts, I've laid them out here:

Our kids don’t head to Kindergarten thinking that sharing sugary birthday treats is a rite of passage. It’s only a big deal because we parents make it that way. Sure, sharing something on your birthday can be fun, but it doesn’t have to be food. Your kid can pick out their favorite book or a fun game to share with the class–Legos, Lincoln Logs, board games, blocks, puppets, a bean bag chair for the reading area, pencils, erasers, stickers. There are countless things that are fun for kids and make a child feel special … all without excluding anyone. 

The line that pisses me off more than anything else in her sob-fest is this: “my kid shouldn’t have to forgo his birthday cake because yours can’t eat it.” Let’s just be clear here: telling your kid that s/he doesn’t get to have their favorite treat for the eight hours while they’re at school does NOT mean they can’t have a birthday or have to forgo anything. As a matter of fact, from the second they walk in the door after school until the second they put their head on their pillow, you can have them jam their face full of the most gluten-filled birthday cake topped with whipped egg icing and peanut sprinkles while chugging down a gallon of milk if that makes you all happy. And if / when you have a birthday party for him, you can let him eat sticks of butter dipped in peanut butter and rolled in flour if that’s what you want to do. NO ONE IS STOPPING YOU FROM HAVING ANY DESSERTS OR TREATS AT YOUR KID’S OWN BIRTHDAY PARTY. Have whatever you want. Go fucking nuts. Literally.
If my daughter were attending your kid’s Gluten-Dairy-Peanut-Egg-a-palooza Birthday Party, I’d send food she can have. I know it’s my job to make sure that she has food that’s safe to eat when I send or take her somewhere. But when you’re talking about bringing that same AllergenFestival into class knowing full well that you’ll be excluding her and any other number of kids, then You’re An Asshat. And whining about how much of an inconvenience it is for you to have to consider others? That makes you an Asshat Extraordinaire.
I completely understand parents wanting to do things that will make their children happy. I also completely agree with the author that parents can do whatever they want to do at home. I don't understand why it is so important to NEED to do those things at school where children HAVE to go. It is much easier to say no to a birthday party invitation (although it still sucks) than to feel like you have to home school your child because they are always left out.

How do you handle these types of ignorant individuals?

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